SPLIT PERSONALITY

Amelia in Maui in July.  

This blog post is made possible by Amelia sucking on a pacifier.  That's right.  She took one, really took one, for the first time yesterday.  It only took 6 months of shoving it into her mouth.  Up until yesterday she was still gnawing on it and then throwing it at me.  She has turned out to be a much harder baby than my other two kids.  So, this pacifier thing is monumental.  

True story:  When Luke was a baby, he took a pacifier.  Five minutes before a La Leche League meeting, I pried it out of his mouth while we were sitting in the parking lot.  I preferred to have my baby scream than to admit that I was giving him a pacifier.  Awful, huh?  I don't know where this pressure comes from.  I shouldn't want her to take a pacifier.  The guilt is setting in.  I am a home birthin', co-sleepin', attachment parentin' parent.  Say pacifier around my La Leche League friends and I might as well be screaming obscenities.  However, reality is that I can't walk around with a baby stuck to my boob all the time.  I've tried.  People look at me funny and frankly, it hurts to have a baby suck that much. 

Don't worry, I'm still nursing her like 1,000 times a day. *sigh*