2.28.2011

I WISH I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS PREGNANT

It's no secret that I love the show I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant.  Today, I finally realized why.  It is because I am jealous.   It just doesn't seem fair that some ladies get to go through pregnancy without even knowing it, and then poof, they sit on the toilet and out falls a healthy baby.

Right now, almost a week before my due date, I wish I didn't know that I was pregnant.  Why can't I be on that show!?  I hate the waiting game. I hate not knowing if it will be tonight or three weeks away.  I clean my room every night before I go to bed, just in case I go into labor at 2 a.m.  Erik and I have serious discussions about what size of bowl will be big enough for my placenta.  I waddle everywhere.  Turning over in bed is a 10 minute process.  I feel like a freak show when I go out in public.  The last thing I look at before I go to sleep is the tub and birth kit* sitting right next to my side of the bed -


Keep in mind, I am very grateful to be having a baby and am looking forward to another great home birth experience.  I'm just a little apprehensive about when the baby will decide to be born.  I like to be in control and it drives me nuts not being able to pick the exact time she will make her appearance.

With that being said, I would like the 40 or so well-meaning people who asked me about it at church on Sunday, to know that, yes, I am still pregnant... still very pregnant, and kind of irritable too, if you couldn't tell.

*My birth kit is in an old Spa Baby box that my midwife dropped off.  I would never buy one of those.  It's a bucket!!

8 comments:

  1. I pray that she decides to make her appearance sooner rather than later. And I cannot wait to hear all about it!

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  2. "I like to be in control" ....

    Hahahahahahaha!

    Like giving birth has any element of having control. I've often said that giving birth is like being sucked into a vortex--good luck trying to control THAT!

    Here's to a wonderful vortex ride!

    (and it will be fun to see if she is a Luke variety or a Charlie variety!)

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  3. I've seen all three of my kids be born, but "Erik and I have serious discussions about what size of bowl will be big enough for my placenta" totally grossed me out. I don't think I was prepared to read that.

    Secondly, your home birthing kit looks like it could be used for taking hostages. It reminded me of <a href="http://xkcd.com/576/>this cartoon.</a> You should leave that crap on your porch to get the neighbors talking.

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  4. I won't lie- that garden hose is freaking me out! More power to you, sister! My friend is a mid-wife and loves helping women have a home birth experience if that is what they chose. I pray it will all go smoothy and with as little pain as possible. Good luck!

    And "Hey, are you still pregnant!?" I'm just kidding!

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  5. This is why I go to the hospital. I could not handle being in charge of doing all that!

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  6. Ugh. I TOTALLY know how you feel (except for the birth kit part--never had one of those at my house, just a suitcase staring at me). I got to the point during the last couple of weeks of my pregnancy with Jack where I just stopped answering my phone and tried to not go anywhere at all. Church was a nightmare because it was full of people either saying things like "You look miserable!" or "I know exactly how you feel!" followed by some horror story or other.
    Sigh. Wish I had something thoughtful and sympathetic to say...but you're doing awesome! You're Super Woman to be willing to do this at home--and I think you're amazing.
    (Does that help at all? 'Cause it's true!)

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  7. Just stopping by to say Hi and Good Luck with everything! You are one funny, funny girl! This post is priceless. I wish you all the best as you welcome your baby girl into the world!

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  8. After reading this...I think I may feel the exact same way about that show! It really would be nice to be one of those girls who didn't know they were pregnant! Hope you have your baby soon so you don't have to be pregnant anymore!
    Heather

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