3.22.2010

MY BUDDY, MY BUDDY

Each year, Erik's company throws a Christmas party especially for the children. The parents "register" their children in advance. This way Santa knows how many presents to buy. The girls usually receive a doll, while the boys receive some sort of truck or action figure. (For example, this year Luke got a set of fake tools.) Our friend was disgusted by their "sexist" toy selections, so he demanded that his daughter get a boy's toy. Okay, fine, I can understand that. However, he did not demand that his son receive a girl's toy. I found that to be very interesting... and a double standard.

Why is it acceptable for girls to play with trucks, cars, fake tools, i.e., pretty much anything, but when a boy picks up a doll, everyone laughs? I have never bought dolls for my boys, but last week I caught Charlie in his room, doing this -



He was "changing the diaper" of this tiny little Fisher Price person. (I apologize for the blurriness, but I had to take it fast.) Poor Charlie. We won't buy him a doll, so he has resorted to taking care of this 3 inch nub with a face on it.


I felt bad for Charlie. Then, I had an epiphany. Charlie needs a My Buddy doll!


That was the only doll I could think of that was specifically marketed to boys. So, I did a few internet searches and it turns out they don't make My Buddy dolls anymore because as everyone knows, most boys don't play with dolls, duh. So, now they are a collectible. Sorry, Charlie, I won't be paying for you to drag a $50 doll through the mud. I am totally out of the toy loop, are there any dolls for boys these days? Preferably ones I can buy at the Dollar Store? I don't mean action figures or transformers, but actual dolls. I can't think of any. Or should I pretend this never happened and not indulge my little boy's strange inclination to nurture?

24 comments:

  1. i bought my middle boy a baby doll with a blue night gown. He was about Charlies age. He loved it for about six months and as a result his is TOTALLY my nicest.

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  2. Hayden had a boy doll when he was little and it was some ugly cheap thing we got for under $5.00. He loved it. There are also boy Cabbage Patch dolls, but they're expensive.

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  3. Carson has a Mickey Mouse stuffed doll that he loves. I got it for 5 bucks at Kmart. That's the closest thing he has to a doll.

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  4. We used to have a couple dolls around before the girls were born that the boys occasionally carried around and diapered (I bought them because I like dolls, not necessarily for the boys)and I think there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. In fact, I think it's a good thing. My boys would be so embarrassed for me to tell you that they used to walk around with their stuffed animals up their shirts(nursing them)sometimes. You could just get one of those cheap dollar store dolls dressed in green or blue or use stuffed animals. That is the cutest picture of Charlie diapering the fisher price people. p.s. action figures ARE dolls for boys. :)

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  5. I don't think there is anything wrong with bying dolls for boys. In fact my husband has picture of 5 year old self holding a doll, his Grandma gave it to him in belief that playing with dolls makes guys better Dads, I would say she was not wrong about that...

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  6. My boys use stuffed animals as "babies". Cooper especially likes to wrap them in blankets and snuggle them. I think it's sweet.

    I also think it's a double standard to want your daughter to play with boy toys but not let your son play with girl toys.

    Granted, I don't let Peter paint his nails, so maybe that's my own double standard.

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  7. I think the above posters have good suggestions. I think you should totally nuture his nurturing attitude. If you don't want to get a baby doll, a more generic 'doll' like Mickey Mouse etc. would work fine.

    I know American Girl makes baby boy dolls (Bitty Twins) but you'll defininately NOT want to pay what one of those go for. Maybe a Raggedy Andy doll? Nah, that's probably a 'collector' item too.

    That picture totally made me laugh!

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  8. I do love your posts, Cristin! And I love Ylfe's comment about her boys "nursing" their stuffed animals-- BUSTED!! (No pun intended, haha.)

    Two thoughts: if you don't want Charlie to play with dolls, you could just have another baby and get him really involved in helping him care for the little one.

    Or... you could buy a cheap baby doll and let him get his "nurturing fix" that way. I agree with the above comments that it could help make him a better dad someday!

    FYI, I know a boy who grew up playing with his four sisters' Barbie dolls (half the time they were half-clad or naked, with hair chopped off, etc.) and he is a totally normal, decent, manly man now. Apparently no harm done.

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  9. We bought my oldest son a newborn cabbage patch boy doll (the newborn ones are cheaper than the bigger ones) when I was pregnant with my second son. It was only about $20 at Walmart. The boy ones are hard to find, though. We bought a Rubens Ark stuffed doll for my second son when I was pregnant with our third. We got ours at FAO Schwartz, I don't know where else they sell them. I think the Rubens Ark one is cuter, but the boys are constantly fighting over the cabbage patch kid.

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  10. I bought Curtis a cabbage patch doll at a thrift store for $4 BUCKS! Did you know they are machine washable? We named him Bob - and it was his baby while I took care of baby Ethan. Charlie needs a baby. Spend the money and get him something - something machine washable would be good because he will play in the mud and be dragged through the sand box at the park! :)

    PS - Walmart has Cabbage Patch preemies for $9. They are so cute, I want one to play with!!

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  11. Ryan wants a doll pretty bad...every time we walk past them in the store, he yells "baby!" Spencer refuses to let me buy one, he says he doesn't mind if Ryan plays with them, he just wont be buying one and doesn't want one bought for him. I guess he only gets to play with them at friends houses where little girls live!

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  12. Oh, sweet Charlie. Get that boy a doll! I know that they sell an anatomically correct boy baby doll here in Switzerland - it is one that looks close to a real baby and can be used in the bathtub too. Kind of a hoot when I first saw it at Abram's little friend's house. And if you don't have a toy kitchen yet, boys can cook too - get Charlie one of those too - it is hours of play with opening and closing the oven and drawers and stirring and mixing and imitating what your boys see you do three plus times a day.

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  13. I love the pictures of him trying to put Butt Paste on that itty bitty doll. We have baby dolls since our first was a girl, and Linus carries it around whenever he finds it. But he's taken a liking to all the stuffed animal dogs and kittens his siblings have and keeps stealing them. Ty makes beanie baby kids, new with tags on ebay for under $5.

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  14. Can't the kid just put a diaper on a teddy bear?

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  15. Dominic had a baby. They have them at walmart, target, ANYWHERE...in boy versions. Which really means the same doll, just in blue. Nothing wrong with that. We still have that baby and now Penny plays with it...even though its eye rolls back in its head sometimes now. lol

    cute post.

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  16. Charlie has good taste. He's using Baby Butt Smooth on that toy!

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  17. Such great ideas and wisdom from your many readers! I have to say, Camille makes an excellent point-- why not have him practice on a teddy bear? Did you see The Office episode (when Pam delivers her baby) and Jim boasts that he can put a diaper on ANYTHING because he's practiced so much? See, who needs a baby doll?

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  18. Wifey,
    Notice that not a single dude posted a comment about this, but with 16 comments from female readers urging you to go doll shopping. Charlie doesn't need a doll, all he needs is some more fisher price, lego men, and GI joe action figures...thats what makes manly men...or we can just get Charlie a little sibling so he can change real diapers so I can put my feet up and watch some TV while the future older kids help out with kids 3, 4 and 5.

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  19. If you feel odd getting your child a doll, have one of his grandmas do it. That's what happened with us. I made a wishful comment about wanting Jackson to learn how to be nurturing, and my MIL sent a doll that she's found at the thrift store (she'd cleaned it up). The funny thing is that Jackson decided that the baby was a girl and her name was "Baby."

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  20. Oh.. well Jonah had a doll I got him from the D.I. once. He loved it for about a week. Jonah doesn't need a doll anymore cause Emma is his doll, maybe erik has a point?

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  21. At least he didn't put the doll in a toy oven. That's what Kelley did when I was pregnant with Caitlin and you kids were playing at a friend's house. It REALLY concerned the other mom. FYI---it bothered Dad more that Charlie was playing with that hard-to-get Baby Butt Paste than the fact that he was playing with a doll.

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  22. First of all, let me just say that the reason why I am FINALLY reading this post is because the pictures SUCKED (I know you mentioned that) but I kept coming on to see if you finally posted something "more interesting" and then of course I finally had time to read this thing and really liked this one. Now, we all know that Erik and I do not normally agree, and hmmm YET AGAIN he DOES NOT have a good point. I always knew you had something against giving your kids "girley toys" cause sometimes I have offered you some and you refused. Wow and these were FREE, that is hard for you to turn down free stuff. ANYWAY the super silly thing is, is that if you had a girl who would obviously have dolls around, you wouldn't lock them up so that your boys wouldn't play with them. What are boys learning from playing with a doll? How to be more loving, caring, affectionate... HMMM SOO BAD? I mean, seriously ERIK if you are saying your son can't play with a doll then you should say that YOU as a MALE should not even be taking care of babies or anything "feminine" since that is only for the females to do. We all know what the REAL question is here or concern of you and Erik..."Will my son grow up to be GAY if he plays with a doll?"

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  23. I have girls, so there are always dolls around for John if he so chooses. I did give my young cousin a boy Cabbage Patch type doll when I was a teen and he loved it. He named it Farmer Ted or something and was devastated when the face was melted on a portable heater. And I was glad to hear Eric's work party gave toys like that to the kids. I didn't even know anyone did that anymore. When we were kids my dad's company did that once and I thought it was the best thing that could ever happen to me (a Christmas miracle!!) I always felt sorry for the boys who got trucks or whatnot because I thought getting a brand new doll from a perfect stranger was unbelievable.
    It is very generous and thoughtful for a company to provide individual gifts for employee children and it is sad to me we can't live in a world where a few people can just appreciate it for what it is. Can't please everybody I guess. My girls are girls and my boys are boys. Sometimes my daughter climbs trees and sometimes John dresses his bears but for the most part they have very typical boy and girl tendencies. Our choice of toys had nothing to do with that.

    (BTW What's up with the above comment?)

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