9.11.2007

IT PAYS TO BE HEALTHY

On our journey to becoming full fledged adults, we signed up for good life insurance last night. We've talked about it for years, but kept dragging our feet on it. We're "conditionally" insured since last night. It is a gruesome thought to imagine your spouse dying. Erik asked the salesman last night, "So, what happens if I kill myself?" I looked at him like, "What are you planning?!?!?" However, I did actually think when I said goodbye to Erik this morning, "Don't die, but if you do, I'll be okay." And he probably thought, "Since you never leave the house, if you get in some freak accident where the house explodes, I'll be okay." I still hope we don't have to ever use the insurance, but I'm glad it's there.

Here's the clincher: We're conditionally insured until a nurse comes to our house next week to take a urine sample, check our cholesterol, weight, etc. According to their charts, in order to get the cheapest price on life insurance, Erik needs to lose 7 pounds and I need to gain 4. We have one week to do it. Of course, if we don't meet the requirements, we can try again for the cheaper price when we do. We really got worked up into a frenzy as to how we can pull this off. I mean, heavy jeans and bulky sweaters (in 85 degree weather) will only get me so far on that scale. Erik can only eat so little. Plus, I can't eat so poorly to gain the weight that my cholesterol goes up insanely. Hmmmm, what to do... what to do... it's just that we are so close to the cheaper price, it would seem silly to miss out on it.

This kind of reminds me of when actors put on or take off weight for movie roles. As soon as the check-up is over we can go back to normal. And yes, this is how cheap we are. We are willing to risk damage to our bodies by crazy over or under eating during a week in order to get a good deal.

Wish us luck!

11 comments:

  1. That is so funny- I think you can do it! 4 lbs! c'mon... that is nothing- and erik can drink nothing but a laxative for a day. think of the money you'll save! (I'm guessing it is like $5 a month) I don't know- you didn't mention the savings, but I am sure it is worth it!

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  2. Cristin, get some of the costco protein powder for twice a day protein shakes. You'll put weight on. Tell Erik to run up the hill to Tehachapi a couple times. Congratulation on 10m hits.

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  3. Kelley - I didn't mention, it's around a $17 savings a month, but add that up over the course of 20 years and that's $4,000!! I know this sounds ridiculous, but when you are super cheap like me, that is a lot of money.

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  4. You can totally pull off gaining four pounds, especially if you wear heavy clothes... Go out and buy some heavy earings and a heavy beaded necklace.I'm not so sure about erik losing 7 pounds though, thats a little harder. eat soup for every meal.

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  5. What a great idea, we've also thought about it. Good luck gaining weight!

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  6. i can't think of a better excuse to put on weight! go eat a bunch of donuts!

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  7. 64 ounces of fluid my friend...along with the bulky clothing. But 64 ounces is 4 lbs. Just throw it back.

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  8. (cristin's mom) Whoa! What about Erik's employer--don't they offer life insurance? I would definitely check out some other companies. How long has this company been around? Is it term or whole life? I've never heard of a nurse making "house calls" and rates based on your weight. If you're dead set (sorry about the pun) and convinced this is legit, my best advice is to bribe the nurse.

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  9. Cristin, if you're really want to gain weight fast start taking creatine. I took this in college and gained 15 pounds in two weeks! The kicker is that you have to drink a lot of water! I mean a lot, like a half gallon to a gallon a day. The plus side to this is that it is mostly water weight which is why it's not the best thing for someone trying to build muscle mass but great for someone that wants to lose the results quickly. You should lose the weight again within a week or two. Good Luck!

    As for Erik, in high school the wrestling team could lose up to 3-5 pounds in a day spitting in a cup. It sounds insane but don't swallow any of your spit or eat anything for about 24 hours before your test. Also, sit with a black garbage bag on you upper body in the sun and you will lose a lot! Note that this is extremely unhealthy and dangerous in the summer heat. So if you're feeling thrifty and think you can handle it it does work. You may want to drink a lot of water afterwards and keep the car running in case you need to go to the hospital to get an IV of LR to rehydrate your almost toasted body.

    Good Luck, Zachary

    -Zachary

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  10. dad and I just went through the insurance thing last year...we had a guy come to our house to do all those tests...urine tests, blood pressure and he even hooked dad up to an EKG test with little electrodes stuck all over his body! It was lots of fun. Of course we were both 30 pounds heavier than we should be, but thats us now in our 50's! Good luck to you!

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  11. I want have the problem of trying gaining 4 lbs. Instead, I have the Lassen but, and I am like Erik needing to lose weight.
    Good luck

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